The Art of Pitching

You have finally conquered the terrifying "Blank Screen Monster" and have come up with a really tight story.  Whether it’s a book, a feature, or a TV series, you still have yet to climb that one last uphill mile of Mt. Doom – pitching your story to a potential buyer.  After sitting through more pitch meetings than I care to count, here’s a few brief tips on pitfalls to avoid and power steps to take to make the most of the meetings you get.

Have a specific idea:

Everyone wants to hear a story so if you’re lucky enough to get in the room with an executive or agent, have a story to tell them.  Nothing is more of a turn off than a vague idea. 

For instance, “I think I want my series to star a guy who solves crimes with the help of his two buddies.  There’s probably an antagonist in there, some one who isn’t really a criminal but somehow stands in his way.  I think I’d like to set it some place that’s warm, with beaches.  Maybe a car.”   Not really all that engaging, is it?  You’re asking the audience (and that’s what the exec or agent is, an audience) to fill in all the blanks for themselves.  Sorry, if you want to be a writer you’re going to have to do some of that work for us. 

A better (though far from perfect) way of pitching that idea would be, “The series is about a p.i. named Thomas Magnum.  Ex-military, Thomas’s easy-going nature covers up some issues that will continue to haunt him throughout the series.  Just barely getting by as a private investigator, he manages to luck into the greatest gig on earth – head of security for wealthy, mysterious recluse Robin Masters.  In fact, Thomas and the audience may never even meet Robin, even though Thomas gets to live in the guest house of his swanky Hawaiian estate and drive his spare car, a red Ferrari.  The only glitch in the deal is Higgins, Robin’s very British Major Domo who takes care of the estate who distrusts Thomas, from his Hawaiian shirts down to his ragged flip flops.  Despite Higgins (and sometimes with his help), Thomas and his two war buddies, hustler Rick and straight arrow, helicopter pilot TC, solve cases from the highest of Hawaii’s wealthy to the lowest of the beach shack dwellers.  While primarily a “case of the week” procedural, there will be some over-arcing, serialized elements concerning Thomas’s past.  (In case you didn’t recognize it, I just pitched “Magnum P.I.”)

See how different the two versions are?  I didn’t go into details that don’t matter – like the famous mustache, brown hair, the guard dogs, etc.  That there will be sexy folks on the beach is implied and can be emphasized as you go through more of the potential storylines.   Which leads me too…

Know your characters

When you’re pitching a series, you don’t want to pitch the pilot.  If you notice in the example above, I didn’t tell a specific story, but I set up a very specific world.  The story points in the pilot will come out as you describe each character.  For instance, after you set up the world using the example above, you will launch into something like, “Our main character is Thomas Magnum, a man with a strong sense of honor, a boyish sense of humor and ridiculously good looking.  After getting out of the Navy, he decided to stay in Hawaii.  No more life and death decisions, just a mai tai, beautiful sunsets and even more gorgeous women.  Smart, tough, although sometimes too trusting, it was easy enough for Magnum to parlay his military experience into a p.i. license and in the pilot he’ll show up at Robin Master’s estate, claiming that the wealthy recluse hired him on as his security expert in exchange for living at the house.  Higgins, Robin’s right hand man, is apoplectic at the idea but gets a call from Robin himself proving Magnum’s claims.  Throughout the series, Magnum and Higgins will have an adversarial relationship with an undercurrent of mutual respect and eventually friendship.

Thomas’s best friends in the world are TC and Rick.  Back in the war, TC was the chopper pilot who…” 

And so on, for each major character.  It’s good to say what, if any, character arc your main characters are going to have.  In the case of Magnum, like most procedurals, the arc wasn’t initially very important so it didn’t need to be part of the pitch.

 

Have potential episodes in mind

After describing the characters, you want to talk about the potential episodes in general terms, not so much “at the end of act one x happens, act two opens with y”.  BUT you DO want to have specific storylines in mind that you can tell if the person you’re pitching is interested. 

It goes like this; once you paint the world you want the series to be and describe the characters, you either just launch into some episode ideas or ask, “would you like to hear some potential storylines?”  Usually you can tell from their body language if the person you’re pitching is interested, in which case just plow ahead.  If you’re not sure, ask.  Most people won’t be rude enough to interrupt and say, “thanks, don’t call us, we’ll call you” but you also don’t want to put people in that position of wishing they could. 

Be ready to give some brief examples of what a typical episode of your show would be about.  If you’re pitching a comedy – MAKE SURE THE STORIES YOU TELL ARE FUNNY.  If it’s a drama or a mystery, make sure the stories seem like they have enough fuel to last an hour.   

*Can’t stress this enough: KNOW THE STRUCTURE OF YOUR SHOW!  Comedies, both single & multi cam, typically have an A & B story, and often (though not always) there’s a small runner or C story.  Be ready to talk about your episodes in those terms! For instance, be able to say, “A typical A story is the daughter trying to find a date to the prom” and then say the funny things that keep her from doing so.  “The B story might be the son going on a field trip and getting lost” with the funny details of that.  “A possible runner might be the mom constantly losing her car keys”.  Ok, none of that is really hysterical but you get the picture.  Don’t just come in and say, “A typical episode is the daughter can’t get a date to the prom.”  No matter how much funny stuff happens, it’s not enough to sustain 20 minutes of show.  The same goes for a one hour as well; there’s typically an A and B story. Usually the A is the case of the week in an episodic show (medical, legal or cop procedural case) and the B story is some personal event that one of the main characters is dealing with. 

Practice Makes Perfect… but so does paper or iPad

The key to a really professional pitch is that you delivery is smoothly, as effortlessly as talking to your friends about a movie you saw last weekend. 

Granted, a pitch for either a comedy or a drama should take about 30 minutes.  Nobody, and I mean nobody, expects you to memorize that much material.  For some folks, like stand-up comics turned writers, it’s just another performance and, with a lot of practice, is easy to do.  For most writers, however, relating a detailed concept and flushed out stories is no mean feat.  Use cards, paper, iPad – whatever you need to do to feel comfortable delivering your pitch.  I just recently went to some network pitches and everyone from the studio executive to the agent to the network exec all agreed that they don’t mind at all if a writer uses notes.  Now, that said, I wouldn’t recommend just reading it straight off the page – eye contact is important for you to pull them in as well as being able to judge if you need to speed things up, slow things down, ask questions, etc. 

Even with notes, don’t fool yourself into thinking you can do this off the cuff, no problem.  Just like the way to Carnegie Hall, a great pitch requires practice, practice, practice.  Honestly, I’ll never turn down a pitch because I didn’t like the last idea the writer pitched, but I will think twice if the writer came in unprepared and lifeless.  You’re only going to get one shot at this so take the time to practice with every friend and family member who can’t out run you. 

The Toughest Part of All…

Have fun.  I know, easier said than done, but nothing makes an audience want to hear more about a story than the passion of the person telling it.  I’ve fallen in the same trap – you want to be uber cool and professional, ice water is running through your veins THAT’S how good you are.  But you know what?  Unless you are one of the remaining Bourne co-workers, that’s probably not who you really are.  Let your love for your story and your characters shine through.  You don’t have to be comfortable with people or the life of the party, just let how excited you are to be talking about this project and the possibility of seeing it come to life drive you. 

I was recently at a Women In Film breakfast where actress/producer Felicia Day was speaking and she said something that will always stick with me.  She was terrified of auditions to the point of going catatonic.  Then, the tables were turned and she was the producer auditioning other actresses and the view from the other side of the table was startling.  She realized that producers want you to be good, they want this to be the best pitch (or audition) ever because that means they have a winner on their hands they can sell.  No one but the most insecure or mean spirited (and I’ll grant you, there are plenty of those out there but screw them) wants you to fail.

Since everyone in the room is with you, what can go wrong?

Multi-Camera Or Single Camera, That Is The Question

Despite what Shakespeare (or whoever was writing his plays) said, the real question these days in TV sitcoms isn’t to be or not to be – the success this year of several shows prove that comedy is back in style.  These days, when you’re pitching your half-hour comedy idea, the question that you will invariably be asked is, “it is a single or multi-cam?”  Answering that it can be either one can show a certain amount of flexibility on your part, but consider carefully whether your idea really is better suited for a multi cam or single cam environment. 

There are a few things you should keep in mind before deciding the format of your show.  Type of humor, casting, and style are all key elements that should influence your choice.  Knowing the difference between the two is vital to picking the right format.  (While there are a few successful hybrids out there, most comedies are strictly one or the other.)   

MULTI-CAMERA SHOWS

Multi-cams are shows that are shot in front of a live audience with multiple cameras shooting the scene all at once (hence the name).  They usually air with a laugh track that is (hopefully) made from the actual live audience’s reaction, often sweetened and edited to make the show appear as funny as possible to the viewing audience at home.   Typically they take place in limited locations (home, office, café, etc.) that are easily created on a sound stage. 

The common industry belief is that multi cam shows tend to play to a broader audience.  The pacing of the show tends to be a bit more set up & joke, set up & joke than a single cam.  Staff writers aren’t sitting around the table writing sophisticated jokes to make each other laugh; they’re writing jokes for the tourist from Peoria who will eagerly file in to be part of a studio audience. 

Because they are shot in front of a live audience, shooting time is limited to just one day, although the day can go for as long as it takes to get every single shot.  Some talent will be attracted to that schedule (for instance, an actress who wants to spend time with her family) while others will either like or dislike the idea of performing in front of a live audience.  It’s not a huge factor in deciding the format for your show, but being aware of it can help you avoid some pitfalls like not getting that perfect piece of casting that you wrote the entire show around. 

In the past few years, multi cams were considered old-fashioned and out of style.  They appeared predominantly on CBS, while “hipper” networks like Fox and NBC preferred the slicker look and feel of a single cam.  This fall, however, has proven to be the come back of the multi cam.  The ratings success of new shows like “Whitney” on NBC and “2 Broke Girls” on CBS may have networks rethinking their preferences. 

SINGLE CAM

Single camera shows are shot more like dramas.  There is no live audience so typically they air without laugh tracks.  They can go to multiple locations and have a greater flexibility as far as lighting, camera use, etc. 

The comedy of a single cam show is believed to be a bit more sophisticated.  The humor can take its time to develop; there aren’t any pauses for the studio audience laughter to die down so the rhythm and pacing of the show is completely up to the writer and director. 

The shooting schedule can span over a number of days, can take place outdoors or indoors, and although ideally it will stick to a set schedule can still be grueling on talent and crew alike.  Again, when casting a single cam you want to be careful to choose actors who don’t require the energy of a live studio audience to play off of in order to be funny. 

In the past, single cams like “Community,” “The Office” and “Parks and Rec” had been the domain of NBC, but hits like “Modern Family” and “The Middle” on ABC and this season’s first proclaimed hit, “New Girl” on Fox have shown that there is an audience for this kind of humor across the boards. 

SOMETHING TO KEEP IN MIND BEFORE YOU SPEC OUT YOUR SCRIPT…

Before you sit down to your computer and bravely spec out your comedy script, keep in mind that the two different styles have completely different script formats.  Multi-cams have the dialog in 1 ½ line spacing, and often the description is written in all caps.  Their page length (because of the spacing) tends to be longer, around 50 pages or so.  Single cams are written in regular feature format and tend to run around 35 pages.  Programs like Final Draft have templates to choose from that will clarify and simplify your options. 

Resources:

Thefutoncritic.com has a pretty comprehensive list of the comedies on the air and what type they are, as well as the new comedies that have been put in development. 

Writeisright.com has excellent samples of various script formats.

Old School Rules

Recently, I was corrected for correcting a script's format because the writer didn't put (CONT'D) next to a character's name when their dialog was split by action or description instead of another character's dialog. For instance (and forgive the poor alignment but you get the drift),

TOM
It was the best of times.

An arrow flies through the window and thunks into the door near Tom's head.


TOM (CONT'D)

It was the worst of times.


Apparently, it's old school now to include the (CONT'D). Ok, fashions change, times change, whatever. Here's the thing: the reason to put (CONT'D) is so that the director, the producer, the actors and the readers know that it's the same person talking without interruption. It's an easy way to be sure that you haven't skipped a line of dialog somewhere by accident. It also confirms that the writer hasn't made a mistake and accidentally mislabeled a line of dialog meant for someone else. The down side? It forces the writer to type 8 more characters. Wait, that's not exactly right. Most script writing programs do it automatically. In fact, to turn it off is an extra step so the argument that it's more work falls short.

Virtually all of the good pilot scripts that I've read this year include the (CONT'D). As a part of the script format, it makes sense, it helps the production crew and it doesn't cost the writer anything. If there's a reason NOT to do it, please respond and let me know, I'm dying to hear it.

Bottom line, if it's good enough for Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci, it's good enough for me.

Is Your New Year's Resolution to Sell Your Script???

New Years is a great time to renew your resolve to sell your script. Here’s a couple of tips to keep you from getting taken to the cleaners on the way to the red carpet:

Requiring money up front – SCAM
If ANYONE tells you they are interested in your script but they need you to pay ANY kind of fee up front to represent you or your project, run to the nearest exit. The most common one I’ve heard of is when an agent or manager requires you get your script covered by a “certified reader” for a fee. I’ve been doing this a long time and I’ve never heard of such a thing as a “certified reader”.

It’s not unusual or out of line for an agent or manager to ask you to give a synopsis of your script before they’ll consider your material. They may even give you a few names as suggestions of readers to use. What a legitimate company WON’T do is refuse to consider a synopsis SOLELY based on the fact that it doesn’t come from a “certified reader”. If they do run, don’t walk, to the nearest exit.

Asking for a free option – NOT A SCAM
It’s perfectly legitimate for a producer to ask for a free option on your script. Just be sure to give them a LIMITED free option – 6 months is a typical amount of time but you may want to make it shorter. For instance, if it’s about the Olympics or a “true” predicted natural disaster, then time might be more of a factor. If they want to keep pitching the script after the option runs out, make them pay some kind of fee.

The producer may also want you to address notes for free. That gets into sticky territory. They are honestly trying to get the script in the best possible shape to sell; you have to decide if their notes really make it better. If so, you’ve just gotten free script notes, be happy. If their notes don’t make any sense, it’s time to consider whether they’re the right people to be involved in your script in the first place. Even if they sell it, will they keep your vision of the story or turn your brilliant take on “Santa Clause V” into a horror movie? Are you willing to go there for mere money? Only you can decide....

What Screenplay Program Do You Prefer??

I was at a Catholics in Entertainment meeting the other night where a writer asked the guest speaker, Barbara Gangi from Paulist Prods., the all important question, "does formatting make a difference?" It seemed he'd written a script and had been told it needed to be formatted correctly, with scene breaks, day parts, etc. He couldn't understand how that could make a difference, couldn't they see past that? I squelched the urge to groan and was grateful when Barbara confirmed what I've been saying all along - format matters. She put it much more nicely than I would have, suggesting that if given a script that looks neat and professional vs. one that's all in caps, wrong margins, etc., she's going to read the more professional looking one first. From my POV, I've read some crappy scripts that looked perfect but I've never read a great script that looked crappy.

The point was brought up that script writing programs are easy to use and not that expensive. It got me thinking - what do writers at large prefer? So take a moment to vote in my poll (see the sidebar). If you want to go further and share some reasons why you like (or dislike) certain programs, go to my new chat room and elaborate a bit.

Can't wait to see the results!!

WRITING CHARACTER DESCRIPTIONS

Pet Peeve #110: POOR CHARACTER DESCRIPTIONS! I can’t tell you how many scripts have come across my desk that have character descriptions that read something like this:

MATT, a ruggedly handsome park ranger who loves his family and is tolerant of everyone but won’t back down from a fight, takes charge of situation just by walking in the room.

Gad zukes, people, it’s called “creative writing”, not just spewing a bunch of adjectives behind the character’s name. This is where the old adage, “show, don’t tell” comes into play. SHOW that Matt loves his family by having a picture of his family prominently displayed on his desk or – how’s this for crazy? – show him hug his kids and his wife when he gets home. Even having him talk to his family on the phone conveys it better then merely writing it down. There are a dozen ways you can show this so that a viewing audience gets it but unless you plan on handing out copies of your script at every screening no on is going to get it from that description.

SHOW Matt walking into a room and everyone automatically snapping to attention if that’s what the situation calls for. How he reacts to that – humbly, reluctantly, or maybe he accepts it as a given way of how things should be – is just as important as the fact that people turn to him for leadership.

Being tolerant of everyone could come through in giving him a sidekick who is African American or Muslim or a woman, whatever seems to go against the grain in the situation. Or he refuses to jump to conclusions about a bear – it doesn’t matter but SHOW it.

Any idea about your character that the audience needs to know – they’re smart, they’re afraid of snakes, they’re color blind – every detail needs to be demonstrated through action, not description. It’s called a viewing audience for a reason, people!

You don’t really need to waste the space describing your main character as “ruggedly handsome”. It’s a movie, it’s kind of a given that the hero is going to be hot. The only exception would be if his (or her) looks go against type. For instance, a scholarly looking park ranger or a wimpy guy would be unexpected and you can get away with just describing that. The director, producer and ten other people will take care of his looks. The only thing as a writer you should worry about is how the other characters react to this anti-type character. For instance, if he’s wimpy the other rangers might scoff at him, that sort of thing.

Showing the character through action rather than adjectives may take a few more lines but it’s page space well spent.

THREE KEYS TO BEING AN ACTIVE WRITER

There’s nothing worse than that passive, whiny person we all know (or can become from time to time). You know who I mean, the “poor me” victim who claims things just keep happening to them, boo hoo. Whether you’re aware of that or not, that whiny voice can slip into your writing as well. Here’s three ways to be sure you don’t let being passive get the best of you.

Beware of Gerunds: According to the dictionary, a gerund is, “a noun formed from a verb, describing an action, state or process. In English, it is formed from the verb’s -ing form.” In other words, running, driving, shooting, kissing are all gerunds. They are also very boring and take action out of your character’s hands. By definition they describe the action rather than show it and everyone knows that the first (and most misused) rule of screenwriting is show, don’t tell. For instance, “John runs down the hall” is more active and therefore more engaging than “John is running down the hall”. The first keeps you involved IN the story while the second example reminds you that you are being told a story. It seems like such a tiny thing but it keeps the reader firmly locked out of the world of your script and that’s the last thing you want. Go through your script and upgrade all those errant gerunds to their more active, powerful form.

Keep Your Character Active: What’s the first thing you ask your friends on Monday -- “What did you do this weekend?” It’s human nature to be interested in what people do, whether it’s over spring break, summer vacation or when confronted with some problem. If someone says “A rabid dog followed me home” the most common response would be “Oh my God, what did you do?” So give your characters some action to perform in the course of your story. They don’t have to be superheroes; some of the most engaging stories involve ordinary characters who are pushed into action by some string of events out of their control. The point is, somewhere in the story they realize what they must do and eventually do it. Or fail but try. Even if you’re writing a drama and the extent of the action is that they write a letter, the story needs to pivot on your main character DOING something. Think of your script as an overall whole picture and see if you can identify what the action is that your main character needs to take that changes the course of his or her life or story. If there isn’t one, if things just keep happening to them and they float along helplessly like flotsam in the stream of life then you should re-think your story.

Be Your Own Biggest Fan: I think the hardest thing for most writers is to get out there and network with people. Unfortunately, the bottom line is that no one cares as much as you do whether your script gets made into a movie or not. No agent, no producer, no actor, not even your best friend has as much invested in your script as you do both in terms of time and money. So why let fate decide if it gets made or not? Get out there and talk to people. I don’t mean join other groups of angry bitter writers and sit around bitching once a month about how hard it is to get you movie made. Join groups of people that can help you get your movie made. For instance, you could take a class or seminar from an instructor who works in the business and approach them for help. Go to networking breakfast groups – there are a number of them out there. You could also research who is on the board of directors for certain charities. If a producer who would be perfect for your movie is on the “Save the Malibu Ducks” committee then get out there and help save some ducks. The producer or someone who can get to them will come by sooner or later. This is the part where you have to sell your soul a little bit so I’d suggest keeping it to causes or groups that you really believe in. That way even if you never sell your script at least you’ll gain some good karma points, right?

Give Your Scenes A Purpose

Time and time again I find that writers have taken great pains to get the characters, dialog and description right but forgot to give the scene a purpose. I’m not talking about a cheesy “a ha!” moment at the end of every scene but a believable, organic reason for the scene being in the script. The purpose can be subtle or overt. It can be obvious at the time or be revealed later but there has to be a justification for it to be in the script. Showing off the scenery, educating your audience or plain old ego aren’t good enough reasons for a scene to be in the script.

Here’s a good test; after you’ve finished writing your script, go back through and read each individual scene as a single, stand alone piece. Ask yourself what has this particular scene accomplished. Has it forwarded the story? This is typically the best reason for a scene to be in the movie and yet often the most misunderstood. Marking time by repeating information about the story or a character that we already know (or sometimes don’t need to know) doesn’t count.

Has the scene revealed more about a particular character that is vital to the storyline? The biggest culprit here is when writers give the audience the back-story of a character at the beginning of the movie that really isn’t all that necessary to know. If you’re talking “Batman Begins” then sure, showing young Bruce Wayne has purpose. After all, the whole point of the movie is showing how Batman became Batman. But in a movie like “The Saint,” one of the least satisfying aspects of that fairly mediocre movie was the long drawn out beginning to help us understand what made Simon Templar into the man he became. Who cares? An audience isn’t stupid; they’ll be able to piece together what made your villain evil or your hero (or anti-hero) the person he is. If there’s a moment you really feel strongly about, consider putting it in the present action of the main story. Find a way to weave it into the dialog or action of the without simply spewing out details in a clunky “info-dump”. That’s a valid purpose for a scene that doesn’t slow the movie down.

Go through this process with every scene. Does each individual scene forward either the story or the character? If the answer is no or even a wobbly maybe, then either go back and add purpose to it or, painful as it may be, cut the scene altogether. Working with writers I’ve found it’s often hard to cut the fair-haired darlings, the scenes that they just like as an artist but amputation might be necessary for the health of the whole body. You can try to add purpose but usually it ends up feeling forced, like cramming a round peg in a square hole.

It doesn’t matter if you’re writing a drama, an action piece, a mystery/thriller or animated short; making sure that each scene has a purpose will successfully pull an audience into your script. That’s a key difference between a page-turner that you can’t put down and a ho hum script that you’re done with after just 10 pages.

MAKE YOUR FIRST TEN PAGES COUNT

Whether you’re entering a contest or you’ve gotten some overworked, underpaid executive somewhere to read your script, the fact of the matter is you’ve got just ten pages to get their attention. If they aren’t drawn into the story by then, they either won’t read the rest at all or will breeze through it just to get to the last ten pages so they can pretend to know what happened in the end. Think about it – can you blame them? Any executive will tell you it’s not just about what’s good but what they can sell. Sorry folks, it’s the entertainment business, not the entertainment arts. Save the artsy fartsy stuff for your second script and stick to good basic storytelling for your first script sale.

Make sure that your first ten pages accomplish three major goals in an interesting and concise way. They need to establish the tone/genre of the script, the time and place of the story takes, and who the lead character is if not his or her goal.

The very first words on the page should set the tone of the entire script. Is it a comedy? Is it a drama? A thriller? Make it clear to the reader ASAP. Nothing is worse than reading a script and not being sure if you’re supposed to be laughing or crying at a story point. The more time it takes for the reader to figure out just what sort of animal this script is, the more time he or she will spend removed from the script and therefore not engaged with your characters or storyline.

COMMON MISTAKE #1: You don’t want to stand outside the script with the reader looking in. Saying things like, “we hear the pounding of a heartbeat, the woman is terrified,” may set it up as a thriller but it also keeps the reader at arm’s length. “We” don’t hear anything; the description could read something like, “Jolene’s heart pounds in her chest, her eyes dart everywhere, looking for an escape.” You’d get the same idea – this is a thriller – and yet be drawn into the story rather than solidly set outside of it.

You also need to establish the time and place that the story takes place. Sure you could just super, “Virginia, 1863”. However, if instead your description was something like, “An angry crowd gathers while an effigy of President Lincoln is burned in the small town square,” you establish the same general feel for time and place without being boring or stiff. If your next sentence is something like, “The sheriff nervously reached for his phaser, ready to stun the crowd at the first sign of trouble,” you’ve added another level of intrigue. You’ve set up the time, place and tone as being completely unexpected. The story could be futuristic, it could be about an alternate reality, the audience isn’t sure but hopefully they’ll be intrigued enough to read on. That’s your job in a nutshell; set up the time, place and genre in a way that the reader MUST keep reading.

COMMON MISTAKE #2: Don’t over describe the situation with mundane details that have no direct bearing on the story. I don’t need to know what color the character’s parka is, I just need to know that it’s cold. Remember also that this is a script, not a book, so dialog is king. The sooner you get to characters making some comment on their surroundings, time, place and/or current ordeal the better.

Finally, you need to set up the main character in the first ten pages. It could be like the classic movie, “Casablanca” where we hear a lot about Rick before meeting him. Or like the film version of “Lord of the Rings” where we hear a lot of back-story directly related to the main characters’ quest before we meet them. Or possibly like “Gladiator,” where we meet the character straight away and immediately know what he wants – to be with his family. The only thing we don’t know is that he’ll accomplish this goal in a non-traditional way – by joining them in Paradise. However you choose to do it, make it organic to the story and INTERESTING. You could, for instance, just say something like, “Hank pulls his ship into the Nabu spaceport, stirring up unrest in his Tyrolean crew.” Unfortunately, since most of your readers will never have been to Nabu or Tyro, the reference will be lost on them. It’s boring and disengaging.

What if instead you wrote something like, “Hank edges his beater of ship past the luxury liners around the restricted Nabu spaceport, dwarfed both in size and class. Fred, his first mate, leans down. “I hope you know what you’re doing.” Has he turned pale? Hank could never read his friend even after all these years, the striking blue Tyrolean skin that all of his crew shares make them too hard to read especially at a time like this.” Granted, it takes a little longer but, lame example that it might be, still draws us into the story faster than the previous option.

COMMON MISTAKE #3: Don’t ever assume that the reader has as much interest or knowledge of your lead character as you. For instance, I once read a script where much of the opening pages where written in Celtic. Hey, I love Ireland as much as the next guy but I’m not slogging through old Celtic to read a script. Why? Because it’s off-putting and I know it’s unlikely I’ll be able to sell it up the ladder. Yes, I’m sure someone out there reading this will know of an exception to the rule but do you want to count on being the million to one exception or the more traditional rule? By the way, the rest of the script may have been written in Celtic as well, I never went past page 10.

You don’t have to formulaically spell out whose story this is, what they want and what’s in their way if you don’t want to. For instance, in the original “Raiders of the Lost Ark” you got to know Indy first, warts and all, before you found out the story that drives the movie. It worked in that case because the character was so appealing that you were too hooked to stop watching. You can hold surprises until later, make the audience THINK they know what the script is about only to spin it around 180 degrees down the road but they have to at least think they know what the script is about to keep reading. Mystery is one thing; complete and baffling confusion is something else.

Use the first ten pages to set the stage for the story and characters, and then end it with something exciting or intriguing enough to change the course of the story or character and pull us along with it. Otherwise, all your beautiful prose that you labored over in the middle of the script will be lost to the ethos, never read or appreciated by anyone who doesn’t have a direct connection to you the writer.

NOBODY WANTS TO READ YOUR SCRIPT

Here’s a big Hollywood news flash: nobody wants to read your script. Industry pros like producers, agents and even top level readers are going to actively look for reasons to not read your script. Does that mean you should give up? NO! But it does mean you need to do your job and take away all reasons for them to reject your work at first glance.

“But I’m an artiste,” you say, “I can’t be bothered with all those mundane details!” Then have fun living in that garret for the rest of your life where the only people to ever see your stories are your friends and even they cringe at reading your epic one more time. Never forget that this is Hollywood and appearance is everything. Is it wrong that the way your script looks can affect whether it’s made or not? Maybe, but the development executives who sort through hundreds of scripts a week looking for the next sellable script are the most under appreciated, overworked folks in the business. The same goes for readers. They just don’t have the time to see the diamond in the rough and even if they did, they know they won’t be able to sell it up the ladder to their bosses. And make no mistake, scripts are commodities to be sold, not pieces of art to be put on a wall and admired. That’s the reality. This is the entertainment BUSINESS after all.

This goes double for entering your script into contests. If you aren’t going to make sure that your script is as professionally written as it can be then I suggest you hand the entry fee to the guy at the freeway on ramp with the cardboard house. You’ll gain more in karma points then you have any hope of benefiting from the contest.

You can’t control whether you’re the next Diablo Cody or not but you can eliminate some really simple reasons for your script to automatically go to the slush pile, domain of the intern and underpaid assistants.

1. Do not put pictures on your title page. Nothing says, “this script sucks” like a photo, painting or drawing on the title page. In all the years I’ve been doing this only once did a picture on the title page work and that was for a campy horror script about a giant prehistoric crocodile. The writer put a close up of - you guessed it – a crocodile head with a yellowed out eye and all. It was ridiculous and silly but absolutely matched the tone of the script. But even then it was only because a friend gave it to me an assured me it was worth the read. Don’t take that kind of chance, just stick with the title, your name and, for the love of God, your contact info.
2. Use 2 heavy-duty brads to bind your script. That’s it, nothing fancy. Spirals, metal clips and cheap flimsy brads tend to fall apart, catch on clothing and all around make the reader cranky. The cardinal rule of getting your script read is thou shall not annoy your reader.
3. Here’s another hot tip – the fact that spell check doesn’t catch everything is no excuse for you not to. About the third time the wrong “your” is used, you’re screwed. Proofread your script the old-fashioned way, one page at a time. If you’re lousy at it then get a friend to do it. Better yet, get two; two sets of eyes are better than one. Yes, it’s a small detail but one that says so much about you. If you aren’t careful enough to catch typos then why should I trust you to be careful enough to seed in great subtext or character arcs?
4. Keep your script between 100 – 115 pages. Roughly speaking, one script page is equal to a minute of screen time. Even more if it’s chock full of action. (The phrase “and then they fight” takes very little space but about fifteen minutes of movie.) If it’s longer than that, unless you happen to be Peter Jackson you need to go back and edit. You’ll be surprised how much better your script is anyway without the extraneous scenes you thought you couldn’t live without. And by the way, you aren’t fooling anyone when you jimmy with the margins; people who read scripts for a living know just by looking at it that you’ve played around with them. Chances are they’ll disregard the script and you as not only a hack but also a cheater without getting past page 1.
5. Writers write, directors direct: Leave out all direction unless it’s absolutely vital to telling your story. Putting in the description “CU of John’s eyes are he weeps” isn’t vital to the story, it’s directing and a sign of an amateur, not to mention annoying to a potential director and you’re going to need them to get your movie made. Getting the script made into a movie is the goal so check your ego at the door.
6. Formatting: Absolutely, positively have your script properly formatted with the correct margins. Every script-writing program will do it automatically but if you don’t have one of those, most screenwriting books will tell you the proper format. This format is not meant to squash your artistic whim; it’s there partially to help the director, producer and artists who will hopefully make it into a movie. Part of formatting is using Courier 12 pt., the current industry standard font. Writing in another font doesn’t say, “I have a unique voice, read me.” It mostly says, “I think I’m too special for the rules and will probably be a pain in the ass to work with.”
7. More formatting tips: Beyond the proper margins, there are common practices that professionals follow that make a script easier to read and are sure signs of an experienced writer. DO NOT WRITE EVERYTHING IN CAPITALS. IT FEELS LIKE THE SCRIPT IS YELLING AT YOU AND IS VERY ANNOYING. Remember your cardinal rule – do not annoy your reader. Aside from sluglines, the only time you use capitals is denoting the first time a character is introduced. As a reader, it helps you keep track of characters. If you capitalize them every time, we may not be sure if we’ve met them a few scenes ago or if this is the first time. Sometime readers have to put a script down and pick it up a day later so don’t make it any harder by confusing them about characters, locations or dayparts.
8. Let the actors act: Parentheticals are one of the most over used writing devices around. You don’t to put (annoyed) (sad) (tenderly) with dialog to let the actor know how to deliver the lines. Hopefully your work will speak for itself. There are exceptions but if a scene is truly well written and a character well established, those times are few and far between.
9. Remember your Schoolhouse Rock: Avoid common grammatical errors, especially gerunds. For instance, “John runs” instead of “John is running.” It’s minor but the continued use of the passive voice weakens your story. Always make sure your write your script in the present tense. If grammar isn’t your strong suit, then have a friend or a professional proofreader go over it.
   
10. It’s a script, not a novel: Nothing makes a reader groan more than opening a script and seeing the entire first page is all description. There’s no point in going into such details as “John, a fan of the band Air Supply since the 1980’s, took his Border Collie out for a walk down his magnolia lined street, thinking to himself that he should get a haircut.” The viewing audience will never know any of this so why should the reader have to suffer through it all? Put in only the visual details that are important and break it up with dialog. It’s easier to read and shows you know how to write drama as well as description.

Remember, no one in Hollywood ever lost their job for saying “no.” You owe it to yourself and your script to make them at least work for the “no” rather than passing on your script with barely a glance.